An old piece of weather lore is that a cloudy sky will produce rain unless there is a patch of blue sky large enough to make a sailor a pair of trousers. But I hit a problem . . .
It’s cloudy today; but look, there’s a patch
Of blue sky! So is it enough
To make for a sailor some trousers, I ask?
But finding the answer is tough:
How big is the sailor? How long are his legs?
Are the trousers bell-bottomed or straight?
And how distant, d’you think, is that patch of sky
Of which we’re deciding the fate?
But one awkward matter has now to be raised:
Though our patch has a sapphire-like hue,
It isn’t the colour the Royal Navy wears* –
For that is, of course, navy blue!
For all of these years, I’ve been wasting my time
On fruitless sartorial sums
Handed down to their gullible, innocent young
By grannies and aunties and mums.
But it passes the time on a hot summer’s day;
And – who knows? – the RN might surprise
With a change to sky blue for their jolly Jack Tars:
Then I’ll tell ’em where to get their supplies.
- Not now, anyway – the uniform changed in 2015.