Underactive

Levels of thyroid-stimulating hormone (TSH) in my blood were a tad higher than expected. My GP explained why, and prescribed a remedy.

My thyroid’s underactive,
It’s not up to the job:
In layman’s terms, the thing’s behaving
Like a lazy teenage slob.

It ought to make thyroxine,
To keep my body going;
But its attitude to life of late’s
Been much too easy-going.

My poor pea-sized pituitary
(Which has enough to do)
Stepped up the hormone TSH
To get the message through.

But all to no avail, it seems –
My thyroid is a devil,
Ignoring the pituitary’s pleas
To raise its output level.

Well, now the time has come
To outsource my supply
Of thyroxine by taking pills
That keep its levels high.

So take a rest, pituitary,
And thanks for all you’ve done
To stir my lazy teenage slob –
You never could have won.

[Image: Harvard Medical School]
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