‘Snake oil’, says Wikipedia, is a term used to describe deceptive marketing, health care fraud, or a scam. It seemed to fit the promotion of Spa water for curing almost every ailment afflicting wealthy British folk after Queen Elizabeth I visited Bath in 1574.
They thought they suffered ailments which the medics couldn’t fix,
So the Upper Class were suckers for the Spa promotors’ tricks.
Spa waters, they were told, were ancient (that was true)
And would cure them of their illness* if they’d pay a pound or two.
So to Malvern, Matlock, Tunbridge Wells, and Cheltenham and Bath,
The aristocracy of Britain beat an optimistic path.
So many famous people had partaken of ‘the Cure’
That those chalybeate and saline springs had gained a strong allure.
You bathed in them or drank them, in luxurious environs,
Assured that you would benefit from various mineral ions.
(It’s likely that immersion in a warming thermal spring
Was good for skin diseases, muscles, joints, that sort of thing.)
But scant evidence was offered to accompany the claims
Made by the Spa promotors, who had rather different aims.
Who needs supporting evidence when placebo does the trick
Of lightening the wallets of the rich who think they’re sick?
- For example:
Ulcers, scurvy, fevers, obesity, worms, biliousness,
Rabies, cancer, dropsy, ‘moist brains’ and sheer forgetfulness,
St Vitus’ Dance, paralysis, worms, leprosy, diphtheria,
Hangovers, indigestion, rheumatics and sciatica.